Man whatever I did I don’t want to do that again. Lost all the written things and for the minutes it took to create the wqrds that was a definite waste of time for sure. This crazy typing has a spooky assistant inside its belly as I try to spell thangs a different way and it changes right in front of me. Wonder ifns it’ll get up to pee for me as well. We will just have to see know won’t we. And talk about seeing I must also get better at this keyboarding as the mistakes are flying onto the page.


Fishing. God and I both know we should be fishing. the peaceful feeling it is to be outdoors and with a hook in the water. And the euphoric feeings of actually getting one on the line. Even the light fluffy taste of the fish meat on my tongue is ever present. Just writing about this I can see myself going to the bait store and loading up on hooks and worms and essential gears needed to go.


I remember one fishing trip came back home and averaged out the cost of each fish for that trip. Was over fifty dollars per fish. Them was expensive fish for what they where worth actually they where , priceless for real. Those memories of days gone by. the rain storm that blew the tent and us into the automobile as the thunderstorms and lightning led on. Was a disaster at the moment but to think back now it was the way God had intended for that day and those memories to live on in this mind. Countless days of memories taking the tackle box and fishing pole   

in search of the fish I set out to put my stringer and bring back home to prepare to eat. Sitting on the bank of the shores with the string in the water and just at times enjoying the country side view and the peace nature has to offer. Even to to speak with God for a fish on my line or whatever clouded my thoughts of that day I would speak with him. Fishing, no human being should ever go thru life without having caught a whopper of a dinner on a string and a hook.

 The roaring waters to a calm lake and the sounds of nature have a healing effect to the soul. Each time is totally different and the rewards too extravagant. Bre3athe into my lungs and to the bottom of my breath I feel the newness of clean oxygen and ripples of some kind of cure for all the conditions I have in my life. From smoking too, too much to the wrinkles on my skin all this seems imperitive to the effects this outdoors stuff does to me.

ok, stay in your work environment, go to the mailbox, get those overcharged bills and work twelve hour shifts trying to pay them off and never seem to make each paycheck last to the next one. Or, go to the wilderness route and live off the land such as the pioneers must of done 200 years ago. Running water then was really just that. You ran to get it. And you didn’t eat until you shot some fresh meat or settle for the hickory  nuts and berries your wife collected that day. And of course going to the river then was for more than just relaxation but for the meal at hand. Pressures we have today most likely presented themselves in a different light yet the same ways no doubt. The old grey mare probably like the old clunker car you are driving needed some work on it for sure. Trade them days for these? Not on my life would I even think of it. As the new frontiers that are so everpresent in our world today are leaps and bounds of yesteryears.

From the innovated ideas we as a world of minds can create to the lives that have progressed from the young death rates of then to the modern medicines and health people now have living older lives. My troublewith all this though is the confusion we ourselves bring on by not collectively using our minds and ideas to cure and assist our world as a whole. It is about the almighty dollar. And who dies the the most toys in their yard. Fortune and fame are great no questions there. But at the same time all the college minds we have young and old could bring our worlds together and a much kinder and thoughtful work environment and livings would exist. To help a poor person from poverty to a job he or she would do would work out better than bitching about paying for the welfare they do need. Compassion comes inside the checkbook? Write it off and move away from the trouble and it will go away? No. It won’t and unless it’s even addressed in a formidable way it will grow to a disease larger than anything that has has ever eroded our society.

Anxiety, waiting for something to happen maybe what I want to see or just the unknown of it all. Part of me is in love with the anxieties of my life and all it has to offer and the other part drives me literally insane. Oh how I long for thetimes in my life when waking up was something I looked forward to. Having a reason to wake up and to motivate and go out each day with anticipation and optimism. Now it seems I have to drink tons of coffee and prepare my mind and body to evenface the morning. I guess it is with age the jumping into the ring of fire is a bit more tricky and done with caution. But it just isn’t my style. The memories of going 95 mph thru a day and when it was time for sleep it was wham sleep right when I hit the pillow. Today it is more review of what the hell happened or what the hay am I gonna do now?



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